Walking Through the Struggles: Our Journey with Our 16-Year-Old

Parenting is never easy, but when we welcomed our now 16-year-old into our family, we could have never anticipated the depth of the challenges we would face. From day one, it has been a journey marked by struggles, heartache, and moments of profound uncertainty. Over the years, there have been times when we’ve felt utterly alone, unsure of where to turn, and even moments when hope seemed like a distant memory.

Yet, even in the midst of these trials, God has gently reminded us that He is near. He is with us, and He is with our 16-year-old, holding her in His hands even when we cannot see the full picture of what He is doing. While we don’t know how her story will unfold, we trust that our role is to love her, to teach her, and to guide her as best we can. As she approaches adulthood and the next chapter of her life—college and beyond—we can only provide her with the tools she needs, equipping her for the choices she will soon be making on her own.

In this process, I’ve come to a humbling realization: I’ve spent so much time trying to change her, to mold her into who I thought she should be, that I lost sight of what God was trying to change in me. Perhaps the true purpose of loving orphans, as James 1:27 calls us to do, is not just about transforming their lives, but about transforming our own hearts in the process. It’s about becoming more like Jesus and less like our imperfect selves.

Jesus sacrificed everything on the cross, giving His life for those who may never love Him back. Yet, He did it anyway, and He will forever chase after the one lost sheep, never giving up. In the same way, we are called to chase after our one, to continue loving her unconditionally, even when it’s hard, even when it feels like nothing is changing.

This journey has been difficult, but it’s also been transformative. As we continue to navigate these challenges, we are reminded that this process is not just about our daughter’s growth, but about our own transformation through Christ. May we continue to love her as He loves us, and may we be forever changed by the grace and strength He provides.